glamjam: (Night sky)
I'm having a crappy night.

I know that everything is being exacerbated by the fact that I had issues swallowing my pills when I was sick last week, and I've been bad at getting back on them since. Duly acknowledged and I'm working on it.

Thing 1) Not sure if I'm going to see Ryan this week, which is kind of a big emotional trigger right now. I'm pretty sure I'll see him on Saturday for the Halloween party, but that's not the same with 1-on-1 time that is mostly spent cuddling. I think the concept of not getting time with him during the week is a big issue at the moment because I didn't see him 7 months and although he's closer now I'm seeing him a little at a time, we haven't done a big hangout of multiple days and actually sleeping the night together, which is what I'm used to happening after a prolonged absence. So even though I have him in my life more, it still feels like we're kind of in limbo? Additional challenges include my place being the only location where we can hangout freely and be ourselves; I could go up to Vancouver to his place, but his parents are home a lot and I have to be a platonic friend when I'm there.

Thing 2) My dad's been talking up a storm of my parents moving into a smaller place lately, and while this isn't going to happen anytime soon (say, the next 6-12 months), it's making me freak the fuck out because, hi? I'm unemployed, have no prospects, and nowhere to go when they move into a smaller place that has no room for me.

Thing 3) It's time for my mom's quarterly meeting, which means she's off to Bend, in eastern Oregon, for 3 days and nights. Not a big deal, except that leaves me home with my dad for that time and the way things have been going lately, I'm worried that we're just going to fight the whole time and that does my emotional state no favors.

Thing 4) I didn't get hired back on at Harry & David's, which was really unexpected. I suppose I should have been more cautious about it, but since I left in good standing last season, I thought getting the position again would be fairly easy. So yeah. Feeling really useless in the job regard.

Thing 5) I'm on my period this week, which makes everything exponentially worse.


So basically I want to be wrapped up in a certain someone's arms so I feel safe and less like things are going to hell, but no dice. I have all of the alone and oh jesus, ALL OF THE CRYING. And then I feeling fucking dumb because, hey, it could be so much worse. Cancer, etc.

Life Update

Sep. 7th, 2012 02:20 am
glamjam: (Shirley; not your kind of people)
I tend to post really sporadically, which is never particularly intentional, I just...don't feel like I have interesting things to post very often? And recently, I haven't had internet access at my house for a solid month, which has sucked.

So. New things.

* I have internet again! :D We kind of got fucked over by our phone company (Frontier. Booooo.) and our account ended, so we ended up not having internet OR a land line phone anymore. This also meant we couldn't get DSL from another company because, duh, no phone line. We signed up for cable internet from Comcast, which is more that we want to spend, but the house needs internet. So Comcast came out, looked around, and pronounced that our house has never had a cable hook-up, so they would have to dig one in first. So we waited a couple of weeks, and finally the crew came by and dug in the cable line to our house via our neighbor's front yard. Two days later, a technician came out and officially connected us. Then my awesome friend Mike came by twice and finagled our devices into providing wifi to the house. So now we have awesome-sauce internetz at my house after a month of nothing. Yay!

* I got a new phone! I'd had my Motorola Backflip for two years and was thus eligible for a new phone upgrade. I didn't have a lot to spend on it, so after a couple of weeks of research, playing with phones in-store, and spreadsheet making for comparisons, I ended up with an HTC Vivid, which is basically a fuckton better than my two-year-old phone. I got a pretty rainbow zebra-stripe case and a screen protector, and me and my new phone are styling. And it's amazing and I love it to death.

* Two weeks after ordering the new phone, I was informed that Zed and Ryan are probably going to be ditching their phones for financial reasons, so there was a big chance of either ending up as the main line on the account, which I can't afford, or cancelling the contract, which none of us could afford. (The main line would be about $100 a month and the early termination fee is $350.) The good part of this is that I just successfully got my new, New phone working today - Mike, the awesome friend from earlier, and his spouse Laura, let me add a line to their plan, so I'll be paying the same amount for my line with just a few plan differences and with a new number. It sucks that it had to be a new line, but Oregon's a different service region than Las Vegas, so we couldn't just transfer it. It sucks that I had to spend effectively an extra $100 on this though.

* However, Zed and Ryan will be ditching their phones because Ryan has resigned from his job that they're moving back up here in less than a month. They're going to live with Ryan's parents until they have new jobs. While I wish that Ryan would have given more notice about the move (he's been thinking about it for months, but only told the rest of us the week he was resigning), I am proud of him for taking that's step, because he's been miserable for the past year, a lot of which has been due to hating his job. So I'm glad that he's doing something that's going to make him happier. And obviously I'm super happy that I'll be able to see my sweetie (and Zed) a lot more.

* I'm also in the process of setting up a second interview with the Japanese supermarket, Uwajimaya. :D
glamjam: (Lingerie)
The house doesn't have internet right now - Frontier cancelled us because of non-payment (ie: they messed up connecting to our bank and blamed us) and probably because they didn't want to pay to fix the buried phone line. So my internet is currently restricted to whenever I'm at In Other Words and what I can access on my phone...

...which is quickly dying. As soon as I seriously started planning on getting a new phone, my current started getting buggier and buggier. At this point, I'm going to order the new phone next Friday (or rather Miles is going to do it since I'm on his account ♥). I even know what protective case I'm going to get for it (hint: it's zebra-striped and rainbow-y). The phone isn't the best thing ever, but it's pretty darn good (HTC Vivid) given I can only afford to spend $50 on a new phone...

...because the job didn't work out. I worked several shifts and couldn't deal with the whole working-all-alone-after-two-days-of-training thing. I knew that the job would be a solo shift going into it, but I didn't know I would have an issue with that. So lesson learned, at least for now. Once I have internet again, I'll resume the job hunt. But hey, at least I know I'm hire-able?

Oh Hey

Jul. 2nd, 2012 07:30 pm
glamjam: (Normal)
I GOT A JOB. :D

It's not amazing, but it's employment. It only took 5-ish months for someone to hire me. :P

I'll be a solo sales associate in a gift shop/convenience stores inside one of 5 hotels in Portland. (Four of them are in downtown and one is at the airport.) It's minimum wage and no benefits, but it'll be three or four shifts a week, which is easily 20+ hours a week and more than I was expecting.

So yeah. Pretty exciting news, although the prospect of getting secret-shopped twice a month is a bit nerve-wracking. Still. Just waiting for the background check to come back, then I'll go in and sign paperwork. Need to get some clothes to work in and find a nose ring (so I'll remember to remove it before work - I have a feeling I'd forget to take out my stud often).

:)
glamjam: (Night sky)
Today's been ridiculously emo for me, but at least last night was okay.

After my shift at IOW, I had a crafting date with Carri. I had to get a couple of shirts to destroy on the way there, which ended up being spendier than I would have liked. Ah well, I'm not known for my ability to plan well. I made Carri a new Beth Ditto and feminist symbol stencil, since the shirts she made with them last week ended up being to small. We both made shirts that said "f*ck ladylike", which I can't wait to wear. (At some point, I'm going to have to make a post all the new shirts I've gotten lately. Argh.)

Carri's friend Shannon was there, too - I don't know her terribly well, but she's quite nice and sarcastic!. After crafting, discussing the various states of romatic attachments and the etiquette of sex clubs, we had dinner - a vegan pizza, italian soda, minty Newman-Os, and a vegan chocolate ganache-banana cream pie.

We also watched "Whip It", which I'd never seen, but is now one of my favorite-est things ever. (And something I desperately need an icon for.)


Other things of interest:
* I have a job interview on Tuesday at Bullseye Glass
* My healthy project started on the first, but being emo is making it difficult
* Haven't talked to Ryan for almost 5 days

*sigh*
glamjam: (Master approves!)
I have another interview at Powell's today. It's one-on-one, so this is further than I got last time I applied for a job with them. I'm not interviewing for the original position I applied for (which was at Hawthorne), but for one of 5 positions at the Burnside location. It would be 16 hours, mostly likely in 4 hour shifts. No benefits, but nice employee discounts.

I'm pretty nervous, but I guess it's a good sign that they called me back in?

The only downside currently is that I found out about the interview at 8 pm yesterday, so I haven't found someone to cover my shift at IOW this morning. Susie (the accountant) said she can handle ringing people up, but I feel bad leaving her hanging. D:
glamjam: (Daria; flames)
I found out yesterday that this is my last week at my job. I understand why I'm being let go now (there are very few payroll hours in January), but it's still very frustrating.

The upside, I suppose, is that I now have professional retail experience. I don't want to go through job hunting again, though.

Basically, I'm gonna be depressed for a bit now. :\
glamjam: (Default)
I've been kind of depressed yesterday and today (thus far). Got into it with dad yesterday, got belittled, cried, got pissed, had to go to work after. Ick.

I have a bit of time before work today, so I'm going to try and leave early and get my holds from the library and maybe go to the new coffee shop in downtown Gresham. I had a mocha there last week, but I haven't tried the chai yet.

Also, I don't think I've mentioned it yet, but my job DOESN'T end as of the first. I guess a number of people are going to be taking some vacation now that we're not busy, so my manager's going to keep me on for awhile. She said it's probably not permanent and obviously the hours will be a lot less, but still!

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